Michelle anxiously enters the familiar numbers into her cell phone.

Four . . . seven . . . two . . . nine.

As it rings, she stares at her desperate face in the mirror. A familiar male voice comes over the line and warms her heart. A smile rushes over her lips as she listens to Brad, her ex boyfriend, say hello. Her joy quickly fades as she realizes that she's reached his voicemail yet again.

Michelle lets out a deep sigh of disappointment. This is like the tenth time she's called and gotten the same message. She's getting really frustrated now because this isn't like the way it used to be. He used to always return her calls as soon as he saw her number pop up on his phone.

Okay. So, it's been a week since they've officially been broken up, so what? It's not like he's really over her or anything. Brad hadn't seemed particularly angry when he told her that he thought they should see other people for a while. He looked at her with those big, brown eyes of his and smiled. She agreed to end things only because she was a little shocked at the time. But now, she really just wanted to talk to him and let him know that the whole thing is a terrible mistake.

Michelle's mind is racing with things she wants to say to Brad. A week's worth of frustration of not being able to talk to him has built up and now she feels kind of frantic. There's no way she would let herself believe that he's not interested in her anymore.

"Brad? It's me again, Michelle. Your girlfriend, remember? I just really want you to know how much I still love you. We can work it out, sweetie. I just know we can. Please pick up the phone and talk to me. Is there something I did wrong? Please, tell me if there is so I can fix it. I know you hate it when I get like this, but I don't have any choice. I'm so sick over this I don't know what to do. Please, Brad, please call me back, okay?"

What is Michelle doing wrong?

Michelle is begging Brad to call her, even when she knows he doesn't like this kind of behavior. If you want to get your ex boyfriend back - avoid begging him. Michelle is coming off to Brad like an extremely needy woman who is going to be a real downer to hang out with. Brad doesn't want to deal with Michelle's whining and will continue to push her away by ignoring her calls.

What should you do in this situation?

Write your boyfriend a short note letting him know that you agree that you two should take a break from each other right now. You realize that things could've been better between the two of you. Then you go on to mention some unrelated breezy things in your note. Keep your tone light and friendly. Make sure you sign it. Give him the note and don't linger to watch him read it.

What does this accomplish?

You will immediately be head and shoulders above the whining Michelle, who is a desperate mess. You, on the other hand, are looking really mature and confident. You might be secretly hurting in your heart, but as far as your ex is concerned, you're cool as a cucumber. Your ex will make a mental note of your positive attitude and be more willing in the future to be friendly with you.

Yeah, but how does this help me get him back?

Aha. You see this is only the first step of many steps that you are taking on the road to rekindling your relationship with your ex love. Don't fool yourself into thinking you can win him back with whining, manipulation or force - it ain't gonna work. Instead, you'll use the power of positive action to lead your man back into your loving arms.